Hola chicos!
Ayer fueron los Golden Globes, y aunque confieso que me los perdí por estar cenando con una amiga obviamente no había manera humana que yo me resistiera a ver las fotos del red carpet, obviamente tengo que saber quien gano pero eso medio que puede esperar, veré la repetición completita esta semana. No se si me estoy tirando de mega fashionista haciendo este blog post, pero normal... creo que todos tenemos derecho a una opinión y esta es la mía acerca de quienes fueron las estrellas de la noche y quienes simplemente se la cagaron. /
Hey guys!
The Golden Globes where yesterday, and even though I confess to not have watched them as I do yearly because I was having dinner with a friend, there was simply no way I was gonna miss the red carpet looks. I obviously have to watch the award show, and I plan on doing that soon, but catching up on the looks is just easier. I'll watch re-runs of the whole thing later. I'm not sure if I'm being annoying at playing fashionista, but everybody always has an opinion, and here's mine about who killed it and who was a disaster on yesterday's carpet.
Las feas primero en orden de mal en peor / The uglies first in order from bad to worst:
6. La talentosisima, única verdadera estrella de mi serie favorita, American Horror Story... que aparentemente puede hacer todo menos vestirse, Jessica Lange.
The very talented and only shinning star of my favorite TV show, American Horror Story....who can apparently do everything BUT dress herself, Jessica Lange.
A pesar de no ser muy joven, Jessica Lange es una de esas mujeres que exuden "yo soy una frikin sexy"
....en pantalla por lo menos. Este vestido es como el hijo de un sofá y una pijama. Solo miren los pliegues!! En ninguna parte me sale el diseñador de este desastre de red velvet. /
Even though she isn't the youngest, I always felt Jessica was one of those women who exudes sexiness
....on screen at least. This dress is like the evil child of a sofa and a cheap set of pjs. Can't find the designer of this red velvet disaster anywhere though...
5. Probablemente la mujer más graciosa del planeta, y que tristemente tampoco se sabe vestir, Tina Fey. / Probably the funniest person on earth, who sadly has no idea how to dress herself, Tina Fey.
Que miércoles es esto Tina!? Parece una cortina fea! PORQUE es que tu siempre estas en esta lista?? Despide a tu stylist o consíguete uno. Es nocivo, lo juro. /
What the hell is this Tina!? It looks like an ugly grandma curtain! WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS ON THIS LIST? Please, please, please fire your stylist or get one. It's urgent.
4. Bérénice Bejo, es argentina y jamas había escuchado de su existencia pero según IMDB, a tenido una carrera bastante prometedora, hasta salió en The Artist / Berenice Bejo is argentininan and I had never heard her name in my life, but according to IMDB she's pretty famous, she was even on The Artist
No se ni con que comparar este vestido Bérénice. Es un completo y total desastre. Ni si quiera te queda /
This doesn't even fit you and just sucks Berenice, lets just leave it at that.
3. La detesto. La detesto. Me parece hipócrita y ella solita hace que su programa de televisión,Project Runway de pereza, además de que tiene fama de bruja. Por lo general no esta fea, la carajita es bella pero ayer se la cagó. No se si me debería dar pena la risa que me da cuando esta fea... no sorry, no me da pena. Tres aplausos para el tercer puesto en mi lista de peores vestidas, Heidi Klum!!/
I hate her, I hate her. She feels hypocrite and by herself ruins her own TV show, Project Runway. Usually she looks pretty, since she is drop dead gorgeous but here she SO messed up, hate to admit it (not really) but I'm always kind of pleased and find it funny when she looks ugly (#sorrynotsorry). Clap three times for my the 3rd place on the uglies list, Ms. Heidi Klum
Heidi por favor explícate, tu eres una supermodelo. Porque es que te pusiste un disfraz? Háblame del collar. De que sex shop lo sacaste!? parece un látigo! Feo, feo, feo.
Heidi please explain yourself, you're a supermodel..why are you wearing a costume? Explain the necklace. It looks like a creepy 50 shades of gray whip. Ugly, ugly, ugly.
2. Esta es otro espectáculo de mujer que disfruta peinarse y vestirse de vieja, Paula Patton.
Another case of very pretty woman, very ugly dress and very ugly hair... Paula Patton
Todo esta mal Paula! Porque te haces esto a ti misma? No te puedo tomar en serio así....
Uno pensaría que con la clase de esposo que tienes, prácticamente tallado por los ángeles en el cielo, no es normal su guapura gente...(estoy hablando de Robin Thicke en caso que no sepan) tu harias un súper esfuerzo para no ser la fea de la relación, bueno al parecer me equivoqué.
Dear Paula,
Why are you doing this to yourself? I just cannot take you seriously in this. Everything sucks.
One would think that with the kind of husband you posses, who practically descended from the heavens as a gift to all women...(I'm talking about Robin Thicke, in casse you didn't already know) you would actually put in some effort in not being the ugly one in the relationship, well I guess I was wrong.
1. La NÚMERO UNO-PEOR, PEOR, PEOOOOOOOR DE TODAS:
Zoe Zaldana
And the total maximum WORST of them all, Zoe Zaldana:
Oyeme Algo Zoe. Esto no se ni como frasearlo... parecen retazos de vestidos feos de ballet. Tu eres demasiado linda y talentosa para hacerte esto! Osea. La parte de abajo.. no entendí. Ni los avatars van a pensar que eres persona con esto. Dios padre santo.
Listen to this Zoe; I don't even know how to phrase this...they look like some old dance costume's pieces of fabric sown together. You are way to pretty and talented to wear this. Oh God, the skirt... #ICan't. Not even the avatars are gonna think highly of you in this...
No se si soy la única pero toda mi vida he tenido un issue con aquellos que deciden ir a los red carpets en vestidos cóctel.... se ven mangajos! Mal agradecidos!! Si yo tuviera la oportunidad de ir a un red carpet voy vestida de frikin Barbie.
I don't know if it's just me, but all my life I've thought it's just tacky to wear cocktail dresses to award shows... you ungrateful little bastards. If I ever get the opportunity to walk a red carpet I'm gonna look like a friking Barbie.
Gracias al señor, no todo esta perdido...siempre hay esperanzas para Hollywood..he aquí las mejor vestidas según yo, también de "preciosa" a frikin"diosa"
Thanks to the Lord almighty, not everything is lost. There always is a little hope for Hollywood.. here I lay my best dressed, from divine to GODESS
7. Mi favorita de fashion police nunca me decepciona, Kelly Osbourne.
Fashion Police's babe never disappoints, Kelly Osbourne.
6. Mi actriz favorita del momento, Jennifer Lawrence esta ESPECTACULAR. No se bien porque a tanta gente no le gusta, Es verdad que el mismo fitting del vestido no es perfecto, y creo esta un poco mal planchado y que debió haber usado un push-up bra, pero su maquillaje y accesorios le quedan bellos...ademas de que el mismo vestido me gusta mucho! Yo hubiera debutado con esto 100%, otro día cuando sea un poco mas responsable buscare las fotos y las pondre por si lo quieren ver.
My favorite actress of the moment, Jennifer Lawrence looks SPECTACULAR. I'm not quite sure why so many people don't like her look. It is true that the fitting is not perfect, and I even think it isn't ironed correctly and maybe she should've worn a push-up bra, but her makeup and accessories look beautiful...besides, I really really like the dress itself! I would've definitely worn this for my Debutants ball. Another day when I result to being a little more responsible I'll look for the pictures and post them in case you guys want to see them.
5. Cuando yo sea grande, quiero ser Uma Thurman, uber sexy y súper age-appropiate.
May I be Uma Thurman when I grow up? Super age apropiate, she looks beautiful.
4. Emma Watson es una estrella en ascenso que no planea parar, fashion forward y perfecta siempre.
Emma Watson is a rising star that doesn't plan on stoping, always perfectly fashion forward. One classy bitch.
3. Simplemente no hay embarazada mas bonita que Olivia Wilde, El verde le queda espectacular. There's no prettier preggo than Olivia Wilde. Green looks SO good on her.
2. La verdad no se quien eres, pero definitivamente te buscare en google Maria Menuosos. Parece una princesa de disney moderna, sexy sin ser vulgar.
I kind of don't know who you are, but I definitely want to look you up now Maria Menousos. She looks like a modern disney princess, just the right amount of sexy.
1. Diosa lo dice todo, mi número UNO sin discusión, Sofía Vergara
GODDESS. That says it all, Sofia Vergara.
